What Will Smith did can be a matter of reflection for all of us, to what extent do we act in defense of our loved ones?
Comedian Chris Rock joked about Jada Pinkett Smith's bald head with a slap by actor Will Smith at the Academy Awards (Oscars), March 2022. Chris said Jada's appearance looked like GI Jane, referring to the 1997 film starring Demi Moore, which required Demi to shave her head.
Will Smith who was originally smiling from his chair, unexpectedly stepped forward and spontaneously slapped Chris Rock, in an event that was broadcast live worldwide, shocking millions of viewers. Will reacted this way because he knew Chris' statement hurt his wife, because Jada was bald due to a health condition called Alopecia. Was Will Smith's action right? If you were Jada, to what extent would you dare to act in defense of your partner?
There was a divided debate between those who really understood Will Smith's feelings and justified his actions, as well as those who criticized him, and demanded that Will Smith be prosecuted because what he did was considered violent. What Will Smith did can be a matter of reflection for all of us, to what extent do we act in defense of our loved ones?
Avoid short wick
When someone offends your partner, whether it's a subtle joke or even a harsh one, getting angry is a natural reaction. But anger also needs to be expressed appropriately and at the right time. When anger occurs, blood flow becomes faster in the frontal cortex of the brain so that it often blocks the ability to think rationally. Therefore, when anger strikes, we are easily triggered to be impulsive, do things that are not thought of, as Will Smith did.
In order not to short fuse, we need to learn to manage negative emotions. Always stay calm, or if you are provoked, calm yourself before reacting. The proof, Will finally regretted his actions. The aftermath is also long, he apologized to Chris Rock and the Academy committee and resigned from the Academy membership. This incident became a scandal that will continue to haunt her for the rest of her life and overshadow her career. Hassle!
Joke replied to a joke
When your partner is insulted or bullied in public, try to clarify the situation first. Exactly what are you saying? What is the context? If it's just a joke, without any intention to offend, is it necessary to hit or slap? Reply with words, jokes with jokes. Relax!
Solve the trauma
Often our negative actions arise because they are driven by unresolved past traumatic events. In Will Smith's case, he had a childhood trauma, feeling guilty as a child for not being able to stand up for his mother. Will felt like a coward. This guilt that comes to the surface, he cannot allow his partner to be insulted and will do anything to avenge it.
Another speculation is that based on the dynamics of the relationship between the two, who both had an affair and were in an open marriage status, prompted Will to prove something to his partner. Trauma or mental wounds that we have -whatever they are- need to be resolved so that they do not become a ticking time bomb that could explode at any time.
Smile
Face any evil intentions of people on us with a smile. We can't control what other people say or do to us, what we can control is how we react. One tip from Seneca, give a smile to everything that happens. Good and bad all arise from our own interpretations and prejudices. Just focus on work, achievements, and stay happy.
Of course, this last step does not necessarily only tell us to widen our mouths to the right and left to make it look visually sweet, but also by being aware of everything so that we can inspire it without any doubt. If with a smile we can do it with sincerity, sooner or later the mind will also be softened. Identify possible solutions
Instead of focusing on the things that make you angry, look for possible solutions to reduce the angry situation. Can't avoid the traffic jam that happens every day that makes you angry? How about finding a solution that can make us more enjoy in dealing with the traffic jam, for example by listening to our favorite music on the road or looking for alternative transportation that minimizes getting stuck in traffic, and so on. Remind yourself that anger won't solve anything.